Monday, May 17, 2004

Girly-man elf boy

At In Search of Pith, JeremyT reviews his weekend and gives a fun review of Troy:
The Trojans were pretty damn hampered by Paris. In the original text, you've got Aphrodite saving Paris's ass constantly, so you can have a little sympathy for him. In the movie, he's a philandering twit who deserves to have the shit kicked out of him. He's a coward, and he's played by that poncy stupid elf, which means every woman in the theatre coos at the very sight of him. I'm kind of hoping at this point he suffers some kind of debilitating injury and never acts again. I'm tired of listening to all the sub-30s women in the theatre have little orgasms when he pulls the string on a bow. There's some weird Freudian shit going on there or something.
And by the way, "Troy" has a tomato next to it on Rotten Tomatoes front page, yet it has a 59 percent rating, which means it should be a little green splatter. Why is that? Could it have anything to do with "Troy" being the feature sponsor today? No, I refuse to believe it.

2 comments:

Jeremy said...

Heh. I went and checked the stats right after seeing this. And oddly enough, it's now at 60%, giving it a freshness rating. Now the fun is trying to figure out where the fake review came from to put it over the top. Who was that guy who turned out to be a fabrication of the movie industry a couple of years back?

Anonymous said...

Well, today it's back down to 59% and therefore...
ROTTEN!

CCC